25 Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment? 26 Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they? 27 Which of you by taking thought can add one cubit unto his stature? 28 And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin: 29 And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.
Matthew 6:25-29 (KJV)
I’d like to be crazy, sometimes. Crazy people are like the lilies of the field; it falls to God or others to take care of them. Notice how Matthew never mentions the industrious honey bee that ensures the lilies’ survival. Or the farmer who toils in the field to grow the grain the geese feast upon. Like it’s all manna from heaven…
But speaking of manna from heaven, if you ever run across grain that looks like coriander seed, is waxy-white in color, and tastes like fresh oil, eat it and be thankful. Smile, eat, and keep the retching down to a dull roar. Whatever you do, don’t ask for meat. Verily, that annoyeth the Lord.
…the LORD will give you flesh, and ye shall eat. 19 Ye shall not eat one day, nor two days, nor five days, neither ten days, nor twenty days; 20 But even a whole month, until it come out at your nostrils, and it be loathsome unto you: because that ye have despised the LORD which is among you, and have wept before him, saying, Why came we forth out of Egypt?
Numbers 11:18-20 (KJV)
Hmm. You give your kids the best of everything: fruits, vegetables, milk, bread - and still, they prefer McDonald’s. So you say, “Fine. Let’s go to Mickey D’s. But you know what? You’re getting to be a big kid, now, so let’s get you three double Quarter Pounders instead of that Happy Meal. In fact, you could probably use a side of chicken nuggets and a couple of large fries, couldn’t you?”
“Oooh, can I really get all that?”
“Can you eat it all?”
“Yes!” The kid’s chest puffs out. They’re feeling all grown up. You can almost hear the chest hairs sprouting.
“Sure, then. But you have to eat it all. No wasting food, okay? Deal?”
“Yay!!! Deal!”
You know how this goes, right? The kid’s eyes light up. He’s in McDonald’s heaven. About halfway through the first Quarter Pounder, he’s full - but he knows he can’t admit that to Mom or Dad. He dutifully finishes it off, picks at a few fries, looks up to see if anyone’s watching. They are. Reluctantly, he picks up the second Quarter Pounder… By the third, he’s about got Quarter Pounder coming out his nose and ears, and he’s turned a lovely shade of puke green.
Morals:
- Waste not, want not.
- Be careful what you wish for; you just might get it.
- Don’t be a little ingrate, you snot-nosed brat. (God had His bad days as a parent, too. I now feel a little better about the time William and I had that battle over strained carrots and he somehow ended up with a spoonful of them dripping off the end of his nose. At least he didn’t have a nose dripping off his FACE… Playing the leprosy card seems a little harsh, even for God.)
5 And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. 6 But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly. 7 But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking. 8 Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him.
Matthew 6:5-8 (KJV)
Or, as my dad used to say, “Don’t break your arm patting yourself on the back.” My closet is my head. My conversations with God, one-sided as they often are, are between Him and me. My prayers, more often than not, consist of things like, “Oooh, cool rainbow! Thank you for that,” or, “Gee, I appreciate the vote of confidence here, but they’re always saying you don’t ask us to carry burdens greater than we can bear, and I think I just heard three vertebrae pop…”
Really. My needs are few, and I’ve already been given the means and the ability to take care of most of them without having to ask for divine intervention at every turn. Thank you for that. I keep thinking that Divine intervention is for things like…Darfur. Iraq. And a culture where it’s becoming increasingly commonplace for people to kill their babies and dump them at the side of the road. My needs, such as they are, can wait.
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